I’ve always valued my mind, more than my body.
But it’s no secret my outside is loud.
The outside can attract a lot of attention, simply for existing. 🧍🏻♀️
I’ve trained myself to look through crowds and dart my eyes beyond people, just so I don’t notice them, noticing me. Because sometimes it took pieces of me when I did notice.
You see, shame would land. Even if I wasn’t putting myself out there and looking for attention.
I’ve realized I have some conditioned shame, passed on through ancestral stuff, but also parts of my own through the natural course of life.
I’ve also been sexually abused – inappropriately groped and spoken to with suggestive remarks by an adult almost 3 times my age when I was 16.
It’s taken me some years to unwind all of the above. The ancestral stuff being some of the toughest, personally. My mom is a modest lady. As was her mother. & To go out on a limb and do something like boudoir photos, the idea of ‘wrong hands’ comes to her mind and through her loving words.
But, I’ve been in wrong hands before. And I no longer want to feel like I’m stuck living for others anymore. I dove into the adventure of boudoir as a way of TAKING MY POWER BACK OVER MY OWN DAMN BODY & MY SEXUALITY.
And let me tell you, it was initially terrifying to get vulnerable. But it was the good kind of terrifying. The good kind of vulnerable. The safe space to express and to explore me.
This was MY version of unwinding the inside, unraveling my mind, through this external avenue…. Just like yoga – We use the physical to get into the mental. ❤️
What ways have you taken YOUR power back that left you feeling more empowered through the process?